Finally Got Me Some!

OG's you pervs. Finally got me some OG'S...

Today has been such a weird day. There's an odd vibe in the air that seems to be throwing every one off.

Wait, please stand by while cranking up Clint Eastwood by the Gorillaz

Okay, back now with my sunshine in a bag. Don't make me bust out the lyrics. Finally, someone let me out of my cage...

Anyway, back to the weird vibe. It's so intangible, I can't really put my finger on it. It's such a weird vibe that I can't even figure out how to get out of this topic now, because I can't verbalize what's going on, so let's just pretend like this never happened, m-kay?

My daughter, the infamous Smoodge, has an uncanny knack at taking a crap right before we are about to walk out the door in the mornings. Doesn't matter if it's 7:15, 8:00, or even 10:00am. Always in the morning, always right before we leave. Literally. Like, I'm saying, come on Smoodge, let's go, and she's gripping the edge of the sofa with her face turning red and a look that only says one thing... Poop's a-comin'. And on the days that we don't go somewhere in the morning, then it happens at random in the afternoon. What makes it most frustrating is that I am no longer on time. To anything. And that is like the most horrendous sin ever. Worse than murder. Because if you're murdered, you don't have to worry about showing up on time ever again. And if you're the murderer, then 1.) you really don't have to be anywhere, and 2.) if you do have to be somewhere, someone makes sure you get there.

Okay, now I'm just killing time until the Sprint lady, Ann, gets here. I don't know about you, but my idea of an awesome time is completely understanding the inner workings of a business plan cell phone invoice. In fact, who needs foreplay when you can go over subscriber activity summaries and details, informational reports, and oh good grief, did you just say surcharges including Universal Service Assessment? Talk dirty to me baby.

The Edge must have heard my complaint about their suck-ass commercials, because now in the commercial breaks I get to listen to the theme songs from Spiderman and Walker, Texas Ranger. That is way better.

Comments

Anonymous said…
I was wondering if you were going to blog anything about OGs - that was some good stuff.

BTW, now I got that damn song stuck in my head. Thanks.

In other news, the word verification right below that allows me to post says bftbyzbd...
Best Friends Talking Boastfully, Yelling Zombies Dead. That's all I got.
May 1, 2008 at 4:50 PM
Anonymous said…
Oh that sucks, I forgot a B...
May 1, 2008 at 4:50 PM
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