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You got some 'splainin' to do

Sunday night. The time is currently 2357. Or 11:57pm. Whichever floats your boat.Normally...well...normally as in for the last two months exactly....this would not be a big deal. The being awake on a Sunday night at 2359 (11:59pm). Why?Because I was unemployed.My Monday mornings consisted of rolling out of bed with just enough time to pee, rub that crusty shit out of my eyes, put on pants, get the monkey ready for school, and roll out. Like a boss. Or baws. Whichever.But this Monday morning? The one that's happening directly?I gots me a job.So why is it that it's 0002, and I'm awake? And not just awake. But flogging.Oh holy hell my phone just corrected blogging to flogging.Some parallels there maybe? Methinks yes.Anyway. Blogging. From my phone even.Because I can't sleeeeeeeep!I'm not excited. No really. I'm not. I don't know what I'm walking into, why would I be excited? And I'm not nervous for the same reason.Here's what I know:
I am going to …

I....you....it's.... Huh.

**Back story: the monkey was on the phone with her father, and mentioned that her Grandpa Larry had died, and was in Heaven with Jesus.  The following is the text exchange between him and I after the phone call ended**
Ex: Did someone die?  She said "papa and Lilly went to Jesus" Me: Grandpa Larry. He died of cancer the day after Easter Ex: I'm sorry to hear that. My condolences. Is she handling the loss okay? Me:  It's hard for her to understand.  It's not tangible for her.  So she talks about it on occasion.  His picture is on my desk in the office, and she saw it while on the phone with you and thought she would bring it up. Ex: Thanks for the info.  I wanted to be able to speak with her if she did ask questions.  Again, my condolences. Me: We tell her he isn't sick any more because he's in Heaven with Jesus.  Same with a bunny that died at her daycare.  Miss Carol's bunny if it comes up as well.  Generally it's always brought up on the same conversa…

Who's the Chuck Norris of gardening now?

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Sprouts!  People!  We have sprouts!

I've been keeping my unemployed self busy the last week or so painting my office and getting it usable, which is another post in and of itself.

But first?  To quell the nay saying cries of "NO PICTURES NO HAPPEN."

On Saturday?  No.  Today is Saturday.  Or yesterday.  Whatever.  Not Saturday.  Guess it would have been Thursday?  Sure, we'll go with Thursday.

*Thursday* as I was breaking down my make shift office to move it into the actual office, I had to move my pellets of nothingness.  And after having spent two months of love and labor to get those little shit seeds to sprout and gotten nothing...NOTHING...in return, I had resigned myself to tossing all 72 pellets of wasted energy into the trash.  I had a moment of silence for all the vegetable death that had occurred, and carried my starter tray outside to chunk that bitch in the trash.

And then?  The sun hit something inside the plastic cover just right.  Was that a hint of gre…

Ahem *cough, cough

Yes, yes, I'm still here.  I just do not have anything to talk about.

No seriously.  Let's go through the checklist, shall we?

Job front - still unemployed.  check.
Garden - still not growing.  not even a little bit.  check.
Running - haven't been since the last race.  check.
Weather - still cold and crappy.  check.

So yeah, you know.  Lots of good stuff rockin' over here.

Monkey leaves for Texas in a few days, so there's that.

I am totally not winning lately, gah.

Blank spots

There aren't really many words in my head right now, just a lot of pain.

Usually I love Easter.  No seriously.  I haven't really thought about it until just now, but I would have to say it's probably my favorite holiday.

But this year it's different.

I can't really say all I'm feeling.  Not because I don't want to, but because I literally don't know how to put into words the emotions.

I've been praying and reading a lot of Scripture.  Sometimes I'm afraid that maybe my prayers to take away the pain is what brought us to this point.  Mostly I hope that it's bringing comfort where it's needed.

And I wish I could do more.

Jesus replied, "You do not realise now what I am doing, but later you will understand." John 13:7

It's not pot. Probably.

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Two weeks.  It's been two weeks since I planted the first seeds.  And do I have sprouts?
No.  No I do not.
So I've decided to change directions a bit.
See, in Texas, tomato and cucumber plants, even strawberries, are flourishing and flowering.  Here in Misery, we are still in 40 degree weather.
This is foreign to me.
Also foreign?  The tornado drill (OMG I HOPE ITS A DRILL) that is happening right now.  Sirens and all.  I am writing this and resisting the urge to cower in the fetal position in my basement.
Basements are also foreign to me.
But back to the plants.
I was telling my grandmother that none of my seeds had sprouted.  She asked where I had them.  I said outside.  She said duh.  Not really, but she could have.  Basically, the weather here is still too arctic for anything to be motivated to sprout.  And understandably so.  I have a hard time getting out from under my covers in the morning.  Basically my veggies and I are a bit of the same.
So I've brought them inside and pu…

Great. Now I'm going to die of Lyme Disease

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** I actually wrote this on the 16th, which was...I dunno, awhile ago?  Just in case you care **

Since moving to this wonderful state of Misery, we seem to have suffered through more plagues than at any other time in my life.

First came the lice.

Oh sweet Jesus, the lice.

I've never dealt with lice before.  Managed to live my whole entire existence on this planet without being attacked by tiny little head bugs.  But we moved here, and BAM!  The Monkey gets lice.  And of course, since she had lice, *I* got lice.  And then my niece.  And my sister.

In case you're unaware, the Monkey has looong hair, down to her cute little butt.  And it's the most beautiful color and texture.  Which most of the time?  Is awesome.  When you add lice to the mix, you pretty much want to die.  Not her so much.  ME.  First doing the trial and error of what crap actually works, each trial taking any where from 4 hours to 2 days.  Then once you find something that works, you spend the next two week…