The Last Few Days
I finished payroll, but not early enough to feel like I'd accomplish anything by leaving early, so instead I'll blog :).
This past weekend The Smoodge and I went to the Folklife Festival, which I provided a link for in a previous blog, so go there to click on it. It was fun, lots to see, lots to do, lots of SWEATING. It was hot. I'm pretty sure I saw someone frying bacon on the trunk of their car. Despite my best slathering attempts, The Smoodge still got a bit of a sunburn, but it quickly went away, so I'm thinking maybe she was just hot. Her poor little hairs were drenched in sweat, so much so the back was all curly. And stiff. Sweat. God's mousse. Anyway, we had a good time. We spent a lot of time at the Irish booth, mostly because it was one of the Irish that got us into Folklife Fest for free (whoo-hoo, alliteration!), but also because The Smoodge blended in best there. Red hair, blue eyes, chubby cheeks, white skin. I'm surprised no one tried to steal her! Of course, by the time we left, she was not the pleasant little munchkin in the world... I may try to find a little kilt for her to wear, or whatever it is that the girls wear. If she's gonna be cursed with skin that catches on fire and glows in the dark, she may as well get to cover it in plaid, right? I posted some pics of the Folklife Fest on my Flickr (also a link I've already provided), and I'm going to try to post some more tonight. We'll see.....
Yesterday wasn't that productive. As are most of my days. Oh I was busy alright. But was I busy doing my job you ask? Nope. No I was not. I was busy batting clean up for the rest of the slackers I work with. Don't even get me started. My only relief came from laughing at one of the women I work with behind her back (that's really the best way to laugh at someone). She was wearing black panty hose and black fuzzy slippers with buckles on them. The buckles apparently made them work appropriate. When asked WHY she was wearing fuzzy slippers to work, she said it was because she had an ant bite. An ant bite. AN. ANT. BITE. And in case you were wondering, yes, yes she is the same Best Dressed Employee winner who wore white panty hose with Jesus sandals.
Last night I watched an incredible movie, August Rush. If you haven't seen it, you've lived half your life for nothing, and I recommend either running out and renting/buying it immediately, or ending it all right now by jumping out your office/home window. It's that good. Go ahead.... I'll wait while you figure out what it is you want to do.
For those of you that didn't jump out the window, I'll move on to today's exciting happenings. Mostly I just did payroll, which is oh-so-thrilling, but I was also able to yell at a few people to break up the monotony. Oh, and seriously, calling me and leaving four 2+ minute messages, then calling everyone that works in the office to get in touch with me is NOT THE BEST WAY TO GET IN TOUCH WITH ME! If anything, every time I hear your name you will be moved to the back of the line. In fact, you get moved to the back of the line that doesn't even start until November 18, 2010. And if you have your wife call me again...well...I'll cash your check my damn self. Seriously.
And then there's the boss situation. Where I work is very family oriented. And by family oriented I mean lots of family members work here. To the point where I wonder if maybe there wasn't some in-breeding. DEFINITELY some nepotism. Anyway, here's the information you need for the following story. There's my boss, whom we'll call HBS (for head boss, right A.Shine?), and then there is his sister, who also works here, whom we'll call.... Mosquito. We could probably call her by her real name, since HBS only has one sister, but it makes the story so much more interesting if everyone has code names. So Mosquito just moved back here, and has been pestering me the last couple of days for a new phone. We're in the process of a changeover with our work phones, so I was somewhat hesitant, until Mosquito assured me that HBS had said it would be okay to get her the cheapest phone available. This happened yesterday. Today, HBS graced me with is presence and handed me the phone of someone who recently quit, whom we'll call Banshee. That's not at all important to the story, but you should know that this woman was INSANELY LOUD. SHE SPOKE IN ALL CAPS, ALL THE TIME. AND THE ALL CAPS ALL THE TIME IS JUST HER NORMAL SPEAKING VOICE. WHEN SHE GOT EXCITED....well, I don't have a font big enough. Anyway, I digress. So HBS brings me Banshee's phone, says here ya go, and walks off. And I'm holding the phone and I think, hey, maybe instead of spending money on Mosquito's phone, she can just use this one. I run after HBS and say, hey, HBS, do you care if Mosquito uses this phone? I mean, I know you said to get her whatever is cheapest, and and since free is the cheapest of them all...- He cuts me off at this point and says, I never said that. Straight-faced. And without thinking I start into, Mosquito said that you said... Trailing off into nothing because I realize that I just got sucked into a little bit of brother/sister he said/she said. Instead I finish with, you know what? I'm not even getting into the middle of this. And I walk off. Feeling like a complete idiot. So guess what, Mosquito? From now on, your HBS approval's will need to be done in writing. With a signature. In blood. So there.
Whoo-hoo! I've succeeded in killing enough time to that it's time to go! HASTA SUCKAS!!!
This past weekend The Smoodge and I went to the Folklife Festival, which I provided a link for in a previous blog, so go there to click on it. It was fun, lots to see, lots to do, lots of SWEATING. It was hot. I'm pretty sure I saw someone frying bacon on the trunk of their car. Despite my best slathering attempts, The Smoodge still got a bit of a sunburn, but it quickly went away, so I'm thinking maybe she was just hot. Her poor little hairs were drenched in sweat, so much so the back was all curly. And stiff. Sweat. God's mousse. Anyway, we had a good time. We spent a lot of time at the Irish booth, mostly because it was one of the Irish that got us into Folklife Fest for free (whoo-hoo, alliteration!), but also because The Smoodge blended in best there. Red hair, blue eyes, chubby cheeks, white skin. I'm surprised no one tried to steal her! Of course, by the time we left, she was not the pleasant little munchkin in the world... I may try to find a little kilt for her to wear, or whatever it is that the girls wear. If she's gonna be cursed with skin that catches on fire and glows in the dark, she may as well get to cover it in plaid, right? I posted some pics of the Folklife Fest on my Flickr (also a link I've already provided), and I'm going to try to post some more tonight. We'll see.....
Yesterday wasn't that productive. As are most of my days. Oh I was busy alright. But was I busy doing my job you ask? Nope. No I was not. I was busy batting clean up for the rest of the slackers I work with. Don't even get me started. My only relief came from laughing at one of the women I work with behind her back (that's really the best way to laugh at someone). She was wearing black panty hose and black fuzzy slippers with buckles on them. The buckles apparently made them work appropriate. When asked WHY she was wearing fuzzy slippers to work, she said it was because she had an ant bite. An ant bite. AN. ANT. BITE. And in case you were wondering, yes, yes she is the same Best Dressed Employee winner who wore white panty hose with Jesus sandals.
Last night I watched an incredible movie, August Rush. If you haven't seen it, you've lived half your life for nothing, and I recommend either running out and renting/buying it immediately, or ending it all right now by jumping out your office/home window. It's that good. Go ahead.... I'll wait while you figure out what it is you want to do.
For those of you that didn't jump out the window, I'll move on to today's exciting happenings. Mostly I just did payroll, which is oh-so-thrilling, but I was also able to yell at a few people to break up the monotony. Oh, and seriously, calling me and leaving four 2+ minute messages, then calling everyone that works in the office to get in touch with me is NOT THE BEST WAY TO GET IN TOUCH WITH ME! If anything, every time I hear your name you will be moved to the back of the line. In fact, you get moved to the back of the line that doesn't even start until November 18, 2010. And if you have your wife call me again...well...I'll cash your check my damn self. Seriously.
And then there's the boss situation. Where I work is very family oriented. And by family oriented I mean lots of family members work here. To the point where I wonder if maybe there wasn't some in-breeding. DEFINITELY some nepotism. Anyway, here's the information you need for the following story. There's my boss, whom we'll call HBS (for head boss, right A.Shine?), and then there is his sister, who also works here, whom we'll call.... Mosquito. We could probably call her by her real name, since HBS only has one sister, but it makes the story so much more interesting if everyone has code names. So Mosquito just moved back here, and has been pestering me the last couple of days for a new phone. We're in the process of a changeover with our work phones, so I was somewhat hesitant, until Mosquito assured me that HBS had said it would be okay to get her the cheapest phone available. This happened yesterday. Today, HBS graced me with is presence and handed me the phone of someone who recently quit, whom we'll call Banshee. That's not at all important to the story, but you should know that this woman was INSANELY LOUD. SHE SPOKE IN ALL CAPS, ALL THE TIME. AND THE ALL CAPS ALL THE TIME IS JUST HER NORMAL SPEAKING VOICE. WHEN SHE GOT EXCITED....well, I don't have a font big enough. Anyway, I digress. So HBS brings me Banshee's phone, says here ya go, and walks off. And I'm holding the phone and I think, hey, maybe instead of spending money on Mosquito's phone, she can just use this one. I run after HBS and say, hey, HBS, do you care if Mosquito uses this phone? I mean, I know you said to get her whatever is cheapest, and and since free is the cheapest of them all...- He cuts me off at this point and says, I never said that. Straight-faced. And without thinking I start into, Mosquito said that you said... Trailing off into nothing because I realize that I just got sucked into a little bit of brother/sister he said/she said. Instead I finish with, you know what? I'm not even getting into the middle of this. And I walk off. Feeling like a complete idiot. So guess what, Mosquito? From now on, your HBS approval's will need to be done in writing. With a signature. In blood. So there.
Whoo-hoo! I've succeeded in killing enough time to that it's time to go! HASTA SUCKAS!!!
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