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Showing posts from September, 2008

Am I doing it wrong?

For some random reason, about last Thursday I guess, I started having this overwhelming urge to go to church.  I have no idea why, other than maybe it's because I've been feeling like my life has become the epitome of out of control, but whatever.  It's not like I was hearing voices or anything, just out of the blue one day I think to myself, self?  Go to church.  Since I kind of talk to myself a lot, and most of what I say is random thoughts and makes not a lick of sense to those around me, I didn't put a whole lot of stock in it.  I mean, for all I knew it could be a guilty conscience thing because the pastor of my church just added me as a friend on facebook, and he was subliminally sending me peer pressure.  So I ignored it and went about my day.  But as Friday came and went, and then Saturday, the need to go to church just kept building and building to the point where last night I actually set my alarm to go to church.  If you know me, while this is a step in the r

Bouts

I'm kind of OCD. And I completely understand why. It's how I am able to control something in my life that is so utterly out of control. I have a schedule that I keep, and when something gets off schedule, when something that is supposed to happen doesn't, I tend to start to get depressed, and then I start neglecting other things, and I just let it spiral and spiral until I realize I'm at the bottom and force myself to crawl my way back to the top. First it's my dishes. I stop doing my dishes. And I'm one of those people that has a dishwasher that I use as a drying rack because I don't believe it does a good enough job. So when I stop doing dishes, they just pile up in the sink. Then I stop picking up The Smoodge's toys and just let them kind of clutter up the living room. Then I let the laundry pile up. It just keeps getting more disgusting from there. The point is, I know when I'm starting to get into this depression spiral, and I can usu

Toying With My Emotions

*Disclaimer-This post is probably fairly boring and confusing.  But I need to get it off my chest, and lucky me, I think that's kind of the point of having a blog.  However, if you do decide to read it, you'll definitely get a good glimpse into why I haven't had the energy to post in awhile.   Before I start this story, let me first give you a list of important players.  That makes my life a lot easier, which is what's really important here. Dr. A - PCP Dr. R - Geneticist Dr. B - Cardiologist Dr. E - Gastrointerologist Mostly giving you this guide means I only have to type 3 letters instead of up to 18.  See?  Making my life easier. About a month ago, The Smoodge's PCP (primary care physician for those of you who think I would allow my daughter to have her own stash of drugs) scheduled her to go see a cardiologist for the heart murmur that her geneticist diagnosed.  Dr. R said it could be detected both above and below her heart, and since heart problems are common i

Funny! Funny. Funny?

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I stumbled across this picture today at this website: Come ON! THAT's damn funny! No? Not funny? Just me? I thought you people were my friends. Sidebar-when you say 'funny' a bunch of times, it makes you feel like you are saying it wrong. Try it, right now, out loud. See? Told you. Who's laughing now?

Damn Cat

I am not a quitter.  I'm really not.  And I've had pets all my life, and understand the importance and commitment of having and caring for one.  And when I got my cat, my horrible horrible cat, I thought it would be a good idea.  I though, self, get yourself a cat, for a lot of reasons.  One, it'll keep you company at night once The Smoodge is asleep.  Two, it'll be good for The Smoodge to have a critter around to help her learn how to be nice and all that other crap you're supposed to teach kids.  Three, a cat would be good in an apartment, and isn't icky like a fish, or weird like a lizard, or smelly (except for the litter, I had forgotten about the litter) like a rat or mouse (and The Smoodge would totally squish a rat or mouse), or need room to run like a puppy.  So I got a cat.  And he's very handsome.  And I suppose on some level I do love him. But he.  Is.  A shit. I CANT FIX THIS STUPID CAT!  There is something really REALLY wrong with him.  I had hi

A Post Just To Post

I haven't been able to do this because there are too many things going on.  And by the end of the day my brain hurts, and I can't think of anything to say, and the only thing worse than not saying anything is saying something that is nothing.  But that can't really be true because then 99% of the blogs out there wouldn't exist, and to be perfectly honest, neither would this one.  I mean, hell, the name of this thing itself means nothing, so...crap, I think I just talked myself into a circle.  I feel dizzy. While I recover, enjoy some pics from this weekend.  No seriously.  ENJOY THEM.  That's an order.

Funny...or scary...

So my last post kinda sucked, it was all dark and twirly and whatever, but as I'm going through my site meter to see who is stalking me (and I know you are, just so you know, I know, but I'm okay with it, so don't sweat it...just don't send me your fingernail clippings.  I draw the line there...and a few other places, but we'll start with the fingernails) and I see that someone from the Texas Department of Mental Health and Mental Retardation has been checking out my blog. I either appeal to those who are MHMR, which, is kinda cool, or someone working for the state of Texas thinks my blog qualifies as MHMR and is now gathering evidence to present a judge to get a warrant for the men who want to put a snug fitting and oh so stylish white coat on me.  Whoever it is, and regardless of their intentions, it's their first visit, so I'd like to welcome you.  Hi.  I'm Mandy.  This is my blog.  Hope you're enjoying yourself.  Make yourself comfortable.  Don&#

its...Its...ITS ALIVE!!!

It's been just over a month since my last post, and do I have anything meaningful and insightful to say?  Nope.  Not even a little.  I've even been pondering the last few days what I should blog about once I finally get back up on that ole blogging horse.  And did anything come out of it?  Nope.  So I'm just going to pretend like that prolonged absence didn't happen and move on.  Everyone on board?  Mm-kay. I joined facebook.  To those of you who claim that I said I would never join facebook, I say fabricators!  And non-listeners!  I said MYSPACE!  I would never join MYSPACE!  I never said anything about facebook....(hold on a sec, combing the archives and deleting any facebook references so they can't be used against me in a court of law)....(okay, never mind, I don't have that kind of patience, and sadly, i kind of bore myself)...or if I did say anything about facebook...(whoo-hoo, disclaimer!)...it was that other people were on it, and I didn't get it.  B